Steve-0r-gasm-0-meter: Episode 4:01 (#AlexOLoughlin at his best)

We know Steve likes to race with cars and cars have speedometers – well, Steve gets our fangirl hearts racing and we have Steve-0r-gasm-o-meters.

We would like to introduce something new for this new season of Hawaii Five-0. We all perv about different things when it comes to Alex/Steve.

We want to take some of these moments during each episode and rate them according to how well we think they have been used to satisfy our needs to drool over this man ……… how hard has he been stepping on the pedals of our fangirl hearts? 😛

We will give you our thoughts and score on each category and find some sort of % for this episode. Please feel free to give us your own count and reasons for it ………

How hard have Steve´s actions been on the fangirl panties this week?

1. Veinp0rn (either neck or elsewhere):

FOYeur: Boy oh boy, these veins worked hard in this scene, I would give it a 10.

LurxGirl: This delicious vein porn brings out my inner vampire for sure! I wouldn’t be a proud McPerv if I didn’t mention that there is another type of veinporn I’d love to see. Yes, it’s a 10 for me too!

Average score for category 1: 10

2. Letting the eye brow(s) do the work:

 

FOYeur: Normally the eye brow works very prominently. This time the gesture was so small but somehow very visible to me. It and the whole situation made it über sexy for me, so I give it 8.

LurxGirl: I think the open mouth and sweat drenched shirt may play into the sexiness of the eyebrow raise. I give it a 7, because he still has his shirt on. 😛

Average score for category 2: 7,5

3. Teasing us with the ‘pink beast’ (Paula’s pet name for ‘the tongue’)

FOYeur: Ever so slightly he teased us with it this time. Although we don’t see much of it or any real movement with it, just the thought of its full potential, makes my heartbeat jump a few. Because of it´s cuteness, I would give it a 7.

LurxGirl: Again, the open mouth is so inviting! Makes me want to dive in and taste that pink beast. Would it taste like Puka dog or Kame’s shrimp? I give it a 6 just because he isn’t giving us the sex eyes with it. He is too distracted with his driving.

Average score for category 3: 6,5

4. Haunting us with ‘Dat FACE’ :

FOYeur: There are so much intensity in his pretty face during this scene. I don’t know if the bars add or subtract from it. I give it a 8.

LurxGirl: At first I thought .. meh .. then I thought about having jail sex with McG and yes…I think the bars frame his face well. I mean, look at that nose! I give it a 7.

Average score for category 4: 7,5

5. Caressing the gun (may include trigger finger p0rn)

FOYeur: A big feature of this episode, is the lack of Kevlar and of course the gloves with the naked trigger finger. There are so many scenes of him handling the gun, but him holding that gun with his bare hands and squeezing so tightly while shooting, ranks up there with the best. I give it 8.

LurxGirl: ACA! I give it a 9 I can’t stop looking at his strong shoulders!

Average score for category 5: 8,5

6. Doing the STRUT (modeling those pants 😛 ):

FOYeur: The strut will always score a perfect 10, but in this case I will subtract because I do not like the white pants view from behind. The shot is also done from to far away and that will take some more away from it. In my view a 7.

LurxGirl: I think they needed to get out the wide angle lens for the front shot! 😯 I’ve mentioned I dislike these pants from behind, but from the front….DAMN! I’m not sure what’s got the FOY so “worked up.” If it’s because he’s pissed off, I’d be all for some angry sex with McG! Strut 10, view 8.

Average score for category 6: 7,5

7. Kicking down doors (or people or some other bad@ss move):

FOYeur: To gain access to places, we have seen Steve use the boot quite often, but I must say this ranks up there as one of the best, because of the person and the situation. I give it 10.

LurxGirl: F*cking HOT! BAMF Steve’s hard body in motion is like watching porn, but knowing he’s jeopardizing his and his team’s futures to save his lady, warms my heart as much as it warms my lady parts. 😛 I wish they would have held the shot on his long legs and @ss a bit longer. I’m a greedy McPerv! 10 for sure!

Average score for category 7: 10

8. Mesmerizing us with that smile (sometimes even a laugh or just by being cute):

FOYeur: This episode did not really have any smiles or laughs. At least we get half a one here, with some added adorable gestures. I would give it 8.

LurxGirl: I love his expression here! The huge bloody hand to the face is strangely hot! A bloody hand should not be a turn on! Call me what you want. 😛 9 because he is so adorable!

Average score for category 8: 8,5

9. Dishing out hugs (or other kinds of kindness or affection):

FOYeur: Although this scene warrants a perfect score when it comes to situation and intensity, I feel that there have been better hugs between these two. The one in 2:03 when Steve and Danny came back from their ordeal at sea comes to mind. I give this one 9.

LurxGirl: His arms and back and shoulders and hands and face…GUH! I give this a 10 because before the hug he grabs the back of her head and pulls her in soooo close. But I think it’s the same kind of hug he would have given Kono or even Danny in the same situation. Minus the kiss, of course. 🙂 I would love to have him bear hug me like this! I thought uncomfortable Danny was cute too.

Average score for category 9: 9.5

10. Doing something hot that you won’t find in every episode:

FOYeur: We can’t pass on the opportunity to talk about the BIG stick. Steve handling the out of control bird was certainly orgasmic. Together with the overly intense O-face gives it a 10 in my book!

LurxGirl: I hope he isn’t quite that intense with his own BIG stick! OMG those hands pulling and tugging…*shudder* I worry he’s going to blow a blood vessel with all that straining. The hands around the BIG stick are a 10, the face is an 8, so 9 for me.

Average score for category 10: 9,5

Adding up all the averages of each category, we give this episode 85% on the Steve-0r-gasm-0-meter.

I think it is fair to say, quite a number of panties boarded planes to Honolulu this week 😛

And just to let the pleasure last a little bit longer, Paula made us something extra to remember this episode by………

LurxGirl: Can I rate the last gif?! OMcG that is a 10++++++!!! His hooded lids, the slight nostril flare, the clenched jaw and perfect lips, and that thick, strong, glistening and mouth-watering neck have over stimulated the Steve-or-gasm-o-meter! You can almost see the pulse in his neck!

FOYeur: Pretty sure I see the pulse in that neck vein too …… sigh!

Please feel free to give us your opinion of where you feel we got it right or wrong! 😀

And always remember, this is just us, having some fun with our favorite “object of desire” …….. 😛

As you may have seen on the banner, we also want to send special birthday hugs today (Oct 4th), to Canadagirl66

Hope you enjoy all the Alex-pretty with us!!